Pondering life and work changes for 2009

On my other blog I showed that I have recently bought a new cabinet. This one.



I also showed how I took this.....

and created these.

As I was creating the rotating can organizers for the cabinet; my thoughts were about the days when my whole house was full of crafts that I had made. I made things because I didn't have the money to buy new from a store. If I needed a rug.... I made one from something. Woven strips of old clothes..... crochet or knitted strips of plastic bags..... or even made from woven onion bags.

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If my daughter needed a suitcase for an overnight stay.... I created one from cardboard.... complete with latch, handle, and painted a pretty bright blue. When she was still very tiny; I made her pretty dresses from scrap fabric that I bought from a factory for 5 cents a pound.

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Instead of "real" curtains; I had quilts on all my windows that were made from out grown clothing, factory scrap fabric, and old sheets. Many pieces of my furniture was made from cardboard. Including a loveseat and a couple of chairs. These were so sturdy that they could hold full grown people without any fear of collapsing. I had upholstered them too.

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I had a full breakfast bar made from cardboard.... complete with cabinets underneath. Doors on the cabinets too. It lasted for about 15 years before I ruined it by leaving it outside when it rained. I had taken it outside so I could paint the kitchen easier. Cardboard can't hold up to a ton of rain. I didn't know it was going to rain.

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If I needed a basket to hold some fruit... I wove one from cattail leaves. When I needed a clothes basket I wove one from dried vines.

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Back in those days I wouldn't have ever considered buying a new cabinet for $100 I would have thought myself out of my mind to even think of spending that kind of money for a cabinet! Because I didn't have $100 to spend in the first place. I would have made one from cardboard.

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Yesterday, I kept asking myself..... why? Why did I get rid of all my crafts and start spending money on store bought items? Why did I feel the need to switch from a very thrifty craft person to a high consumer of goods?

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Partly because I was rebelling. I wanted to be like everyone else and have real curtains and real furniture. In the days when I made my crafts I had very little (or so I thought) and everyone else had so much.

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I would see my friends and neighbors go buy new furniture or clothing and I would be absolutely green with envy. I resented the fact that I was struggling so much and they weren't. (or so I thought) I bet if I were to get a glimse of their bills today I would see a lot of credit card debt. It never occurred to me that what I had in my house was more valuable than anything they had bought from a store. Mine was all custom made!

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As my skills at machine quilting improved and more and more customers signed up for my waiting list; I felt that I could at last buy new like everyone else. Also, it became easier to buy something I needed (rather than make it) when the customer deadlines wouldn't allow me the time necessary to create crafts.

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My crafty, thrifty nature goes all the way back to my childhood. Even back then, I made things because I couldn't ask my parents for anything. Being moved from orphanage, to foster care, to relative, to back home and repeated moves didn't give me much in the way of toys or friendships. Christmas and birthday toys were non existant in my childhood. If I wanted a doll.... I made one from corn cobs or straw stuffed socks. When I wanted to play house I made the walls from mown grass raked into rows. I made mud pies in toy pots which were really jar lids.

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I'm absolutely not being sad about my childhood. I'm simply stateing what created me the way I am and how long I've been a craft type person. I'm giving you a mental picture of what my thought processes are and why I think as I do.

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I'm pondering all of this because a new year is almost upon us. I'm thinking of all the changes I would like to make before the new year starts all over with the rush, rush, rush of machine quilting. The key to being really organized is to examine what's working and what's not working and what really makes a person happy. Once this examination and thought process is achieved; a good plan of action is usually the result.

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I can honestly say I was much happier when I had the time for creating my crafts. The crafts served two purposes. They gave me a creative outlet while also being useful. The crafts gave me what I needed without cost which meant I was being thrifty too. My quilting does give me a creative outlet.... but it's only one. I need several different outlets to be really happy. Maybe it's the artist inside me wanting to show herself?

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Whatever the reason for my desire to go back to crafting regularly..... I must find the time for it in my busy schedule. Maybe I should stop thinking of it as doing a craft and start thinking that I'm pursuing my art? The only difference between creating a craft and creating art is the word you use to describe it. Well, along with the mental attitude. If I think of it as art, it gains more value. If I think of it as craft it takes on a useful nature.

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Ok, enough pondering while type talking on the internet for today. I have this sitting in the floor asking me what it can become instead of filling space in a landfill.

I may create something from that box.... or do something entirely different today. The point is that I have another whole day to do whatever I want without any deadline looming over my head. So why do I feel so lost? Like there is something missing? Duh Anita... what's missing is the stress! Now go have some fun.....